The rainmaker and the issue of sex 

A Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity discussion topic

Copyright 2009 by K. Ferlic,   All Rights Reserved

The rainmaker is an individual who calls forth the refreshing life giving waters within our being to water our parched inner dry landscape. They are capable of consciously performing the external role for what we need to experience. They do so not by some knowledge they have studied and being in what they think they know. Rather they do it by following their internal guidance and creatively shift their shape to meet our true needs. They are willing to become uniquely different as a creative shape shifter for each individual they face.

Requirements for creating the most powerful space as done by the rainmaker

The rainmaker is an individual who can create a space which is safe and secure enough for an individual’s creative spirit to come out of the cage which has held it captive. The space the rainmaker creates can be experienced as calling forth the refreshing waters of life to water the parched inner landscape to bring forth a new life. The rainmaker can also be seen as creating the space for a soul retrieval where the individual is able to retrieve or resurrect aspects of the individuals creativity shut down as a result of past experience.

We cannot give what we do not have. The key to the rainmaker’s ability to create such a space is to first create the space within their being where the refreshing waters of life are free to flow. To create such a space two thing need to be done. One, is to enter a state of child like play to have the freedom of movement to move spontaneously and innocently out of mind as the situation warrants. This, of course, does make the rainmaker very vulnerable and in many ways as vulnerable as a young and innocent child. The second is that the rainmaker must create the desire to create life to flow through their being and allow it to freely flow in the way it needs to flow. If the rainmaker is to be unconditional in their effort, they cannot place any limits and boundaries on where or how the energy flows and there is always the possibility the flow of energy will give rise to sexual feelings. In many ways sexual feelings are inevitable for without limits and boundaries the flow of energy which can be experienced as the refreshing waters of life will flow through all parts of our being watering and bringing life to them all equally.

It is here many find great difficult in becoming a rainmaker. For the rainmaker to create a space which us unconditional. To be unconditional, the rainmaker needs to learn is that it is possible for them to allow themselves to make love, and if need be physical love, to any person on the face of the earth. It is only their mind and what they think and believe which prevents them from doing so.

To create such a space within our being, we need to go within and remove each and every one of the limiting beliefs we carry as to why we can’t make love to the person before us. The more we face someone we dislike spiritually, mentally, emotionally and/or physically, the greater our internal transformation we must undergo in order to love unconditionally. Of course, the more vulnerable this makes us. Essentially we have to choose to take ourselves within a place within our being that we cannot not make love.

This requires enormous energy, discipline and courage for we don’t know if the person is going to accept or reject the offer of unconditional love that we give. The most difficult part of this process is the physical aspect and acting as required unconditionally in the physical world whatever that action may be. We live so much in the physical world and although the physical world is only a reflection of our internal world and state of being, Physical Creation is a shared creation. We just never know how the other will respond.

As we go through this process, what we will find is the more we are not attracted to a person before us the greater the emotional effort we need to muster to make ourselves fully accessible to the person. In doing so, the more vulnerable we make ourselves as we expose ourselves. As a minimum, many of our actions will not be not be seen as unconditional for very few have ever experience an unconditional act on the part of another. To be unconditional, we need to give with no expectations of return in any way. We cannot even expect a thank you. Most have never experience an unconditional act from another.

In creating the space of unconditional love within our being for another, the opposite situation is just as great a problem and actually the more consciousness raising of the two. It was stated above, the rainmaker needs to learn is that it is possible for them to allow themselves to make love, and if need be physical love, to any person on the face of the earth. We normally see this as a problem when we are not attracted to someone. When we are not attracted to someone it is relatively easy to consciously raise the beliefs that are interfering with our loving them. However, the more we are attracted to person, the less attention we will pay as to the spiritual, mental and emotional nature of the individual. That is, we are more than willing to accept them as they are without looking deeper.

Here the vulnerability is different. When we are physically attracted to an individual, we do not become aware of the attachments we have at the nonconscious level which makes them attractive to us. We do not recognize the attachment and we end up raise the attachment from the nonconscious through pain when the individual responds differently than expected. Quite simply, when we don’t like an individual, we don’t expect them to respond to us. However, when we like an individual we tend to be surprised when they don’t respond. We like them so we expect them to like us.

In either cases, making oneself available in unconditional love to be present for an individual to create that space for them to experience the flow of the refreshing waters of life and the to experience the life that lies deep within their being can be painful for the rainmaker. It is the most exquisite pleasure one can experience when the person flows along and cooperates with the effort. However, it become one of the most excruciating pains when the individual go into their mind rather than being free to flow with the energy and what arises within there being. Often the individual thrust outward in anger for what arises are the reason why the flowing waters of life were unable to flow and the individual now must face why the flow was shutdown earlier in life. Having the person go into their mind is painful enough but when the go into mind in anger, the pain is greatly amplified.

The issue of sex and sexuality for the rainmaker

As stated above, the space the rainmaker creates can be experienced as calling forth our creative spirit or calling forth the refreshing waters of life to water the parched inner landscape to bring forth a new life. Since we cannot give what we do not have, the rainmaker must create the space for these life giving waters flow through their being and subsequently the individual. The flow of energy with these life giving waters enthuse our entire being with life. As a result both the rainmaker and the individual can have feelings of sexuality arise.

There are five ways these sexual feelings can arise and influence the work of the rainmaker creating a space which is safe and secure for the individual’s creative spirit to become free. Key to success in facing the sexuality which arises is to be able to move past the sex the rainmaker needs to understand both the creative process and be able to follow the feminine aspect of creation. As discussed in the topics "Who leads and does it matter" and "Follow her lead" the rainmaker needs to surrender to the energy which brought the rainmaker into the individual’s life.

The first way sexuality arises is simply a result of the physics of the process the rainmaker and individual experience. That is the creative process for any creative endeavor can be experienced as a creative tension, if not a sexual tension, between the masculine and feminine aspects of creation/Creation. It is the creative tension between opposites which generates the energy for the creative endeavor. This sexual tension will be characterized and experienced by our mind as sexual feelings. Also, the flow of energy generated by the creative process will enthuse our entire being including the sex organs. Often when the energy enthuses the sex organs we interpret what we feel as sexual feeling.

The second way sexuality arises is a result of the relationship of the individual’s inner feminine and inner masculine and how our inner world gets reflected in the outer. It can be expected the failure of the individuals inner masculine and inner feminine to come to maturity will be reflected externally. That is, they will begin to see the rainmaker from the perspective of what their inner masculine or inner feminine could not provided. As a result, the individual may desire the rainmaker to be their sexual partner and/or companion to fulfill what they cannot get from inside themselves. The challenge is to bring the individual’s awareness to how their inner masculine or inner feminine is not doing what they need to be doing and to address the reason as to why.

The third way sexuality arises is a result of the relationship of the rainmaker’s inner feminine and inner masculine and how our inner world gets reflected in the outer. It can be expected the failure of the rainmaker’s inner masculine and inner feminine to come to maturity will be reflected externally and the rainmaker project this inner relationship externally. This is the reason why for the rainmaker to do what the rainmaker needs to do the rainmaker must first obtain wholeness within their being.

Relative to relationship the rainmaker creates, the rainmaker needs to approach the relationship out of wholeness and completeness and with the desire to free the heart of the other. The rainmaker cannot fall into the trap of looking for the individual to fulfill what must come from inside of us. Rather, the rainmaker realizes our inner world is reflected in the outer and within each of us we have an inner masculine and inner feminine. They realize we will look for the other in our life to fulfill what is not been fulfilled by our inner masculine or inner feminine. The rainmaker uses this fact in two ways. One way is to do their own inner work. The other way is to look at the individual’s life to see what the individual is reflecting outward about their inner masculine and inner feminine. Then, try and get the individual to go inward to address why the inner masculine or inner feminine could not come to maturity.

The reason why the rainmaker needs to find a wholeness within their being is as follows. Whether we are male or female, if our inner masculine cannot adequately protect the inner feminine, we will look to our external companion to do for us what our inner masculine is not doing. Similarly, if our inner feminine cannot properly do her job, we will look for that other to do what the inner feminine should be doing. What this means is we look to that external other to give us something which must come from within. In doing so, that external other will never be able to give us what we seek. No external person can give what we must give ourselves. Rather, we each must create the space within ourselves for both our inner masculine and inner feminine to come to maturity. Then, with a mature inner masculine and mature inner feminine we will find a completeness and wholeness within our own being. That wholeness and completeness gets reflected externally and we can then create the space for any other to find a similar wholeness and completeness if we choose to do so. It is here can we share life with another and create a companionship which truly serves each other. The rainmaker find that wholeness within their being and then uses it create that safe and secure space for the other.

The fourth way sexuality arises is a result of the fact that for whatever reason, the process for which the individual is engaged requires the need for a sexual interaction. Here the issue is not to have sex for the sex. The issue is what is to be created between the two individuals.

The fifth was is to chose to use sexuality as part of the process. The intensity of the flow of energy which can arise in sexuality has a way of seemingly flushing out what does not serve us. The life giving energy of sexuality can bring life to dead or inactive parts of our being. The flow of energy literally and figuratively shatters the cage in which we have held our creative spirit captive such that it becomes free to express itself. When an individual is free to engage in sexuality with a totally supportive partner who is looking to create freedom for the individual the flow of energy which is created can be seen to literally and figuratively flush out many past mind and body memories. This tends to occur when the sexuality turns into a spontaneous and innocent childlike play of discovery and exploration. However it is not something that can be controlled by mind. That is, we cannot enter sexuality with the expectation of creating this cleansing effect. But it is possible that we can create it for another. It is about being in such a safe and secure space and having the freedom to just be true to oneself such that our creative spirit is totally free to flow however and wherever it needs to flow including into our sexuality in whatever way it needs to be expressed. It is then the most powerful transformations occur in sexuality or through sexuality. It is as thought an entire new life is created within us. No discussion file on this topic has been created because it is not something we can create. Rather it is something we must allow to happen. The rainmaker, as a result of their own inner work and knowing the path to freedom can create this possibility for another such that they become the occasion for the healing waters of life to bring nourishment to the patched inner landscape of another. However, for this to work, the individual must be willing to trust the rainmaker.

Dealing with the issue of sexuality

When sexuality arises in any way including the thought of using sexuality as part of the process the rainmaker and the individual each have a choice. Whenever sexuality or sexual feelings arises for whatever reason, or there is the thought of using sex we can either be free to engage the sex and move past the sex or attempt to avoid it and try and go around it. If the sexual experience is essential to what we desire to create in some way, avoiding or denying the sexual feelings will thwart our own creative efforts. If we act on the feeling and do not continue to align with the feelings but become distracted by the sex, again we will thwart our own creative efforts. If the sexual experience is not necessary for what we desire to create and we engage in sex, we will not be distracted if we remain aligned with the feelings. However, more often than not we become distracted by the sex. If we deny or avoid the feelings of sex when they arise even if the sex experience is not necessary for what we desire to create we will thwart our own creative effort in some way. This is why sexuality is like a beast at the gate. It is something to be faced, understood and passed through. If we avoid it or succumb to it we will be unable to create what we desire.

It is here we have need to become very clear on the feelings which correspond to giving us life. The key is discernment and coming to know and understand the sexual feeling we have and how and what our body feels within our whole body and being when we have sexual feelings. Experience has shown the sexual feeling which arise when sex is required for a creative endeavor is different from the sexual feelings which arise from a creative endeavor not requiring a sexual interaction. Both of these feelings are quite different than the feeling which arise from either a biological urge or and urge created by our mind to have sex. It also needs to be noted the feeling which arise from a biological urge are different than those created by our mind.

But, we must learn to distinguish between these feelings. We need to become very discerning about what we feel. This cannot be learned by avoiding or denying we have such feelings nor can it be learned without being intimate with the body and what it feels. How we choose to act on the feeling we have and learn how to discern what we feel is our choice. All we need to understand is that the fundamental issue of creating a phoenix experience to recreate our life or that of another and the issue of sex is that sex is about creating life. Some type of sexual feelings will arise when a new life needs to be created or the resurrection of life at some level of our being.

Rainmaker using sexuality

The issue for the rainmaker is most often not to have sex but to get the individual to see how the inner masculine and/or inner feminine has failed to come to maturity and provide what is needed from within. However, the rainmaker does need to be open to provide a sexual experience (not necessarily sex although it may be) if necessary for what is required by the creation. This openness allows the situation to flow and evolve in a way that what is needed by each is meet in the best way which serves each. Here again, we cannot give what we do not have. The rainmaker must be totally open to what needs to occur to create that space of freedom for the other.

What needs to be understood is the rainmaker has done the work to find that wholeness within their being. They do not look to have the other complete them in any way and meet their needs. Rather, the rainmaker is willing to become that creative shape shifter as necessary to nurture the true needs of another. If called to do so, they enter the sexual experience at whatever level required in awareness armed with the tools to use what sexuality can provide.

What has been observed on the journey of the exploration of our inherent creativity the most painful trap is to make physical love without the awareness of what is really motivating oneself to have the physical relationship. Then to become attached to the person, be rejected and then have all the nonconscious attachments surface because of the pain that is felt. It can be a living hell for the individual.

The most important preventative and antidote is to realize it how important it is to have the conscious awareness of our intention why we are acting and doing what we are doing especially when it comes to sex and sexuality in any way. What has been observed is even if we have not surfaced our nonconscious intentions, because we have a clear intention, the process is much less painful and we can quickly use the gift of pain to access the nonconscious attachments and intentions of which we were unaware.

Using this understanding with the sexual experience is quite magical. It is here the most powerful transformational aspects of the sexuality can be utilized. The spin off is that love making in awareness, that is seeking to meet the true needs of an individual at each and every level of their being, to be aware of the moment and be in the moment to see what arises in the person with whom we are making love makes the love making quite exquisite. In fact, it is the most powerful meditation and awareness state observed to exist It is unbelievable what can be accessed in this state based on how we set our intention.

The matched couple sidestepping sexuality for transformation

For any transformation there is the possibility to create a gentle phoenix experience that is relatively non sexual. However to do this, there needs to be compatible and matched male and female rainmakers or creative shape shifters to create the space. What is required is exactly the same that is done if one is working separately with an individual but with an added twist. That added twist is the male and female rainmakers/creative shape shifters can become the stimulus to reveal the inner masculine and inner feminine of the individual to reveal the types and kinds of issues which need to be address and how the individuals mind is characterizing those issue.

The term matched couple or a matched male and female pair of rainmakers refers to two individuals who individually are rainmakers and creative shape shifters. They work together out of a similar desire and passion about life. The intentions for their lives are similar, parallel or complementary. Each benefits from, and are served by, the work. The joint work both assists each in meeting the intention for their life and allows each to move into an expansion of their own being toward the infinity of their being. The work together is not done out of obligation, duty, within a contract other than maybe binding Aka Cords for a jointly held intention or out of ego gratification. The joint work is done out of a deep love to free the heart of another. They see each other as equals and partners in a joint effort and it is the joint work and effort that keeps them in partnership. Each knows more is completed in their combined efforts than individually. Each is whole and complete unto themselves and what they do is based on a sharing of creation/Creation and each other. Within the space they create together, each is feel to act and respond as lead in the spontaneous and innocent childlike play of discovery and exploration of themselves, the other and of Creation. Each holds the other accountable to the free expression of their creative spirit. Although a pair of individual working together to create the space of a third may not full meet all that is stated as a "matched couple" the intention of each is to move toward the attributes of the matched couple - again, not out of ego but out of love.

Each of the two rainmakers need to be able to a enter a state of child like play to become as innocent and vulnerable in many ways as a young child. That is, they approach what needs to be done with a beginner’s mind and the freedom to creatively shift their shape to meet the true needs of the individual.

The two rainmakers hold a joint intention and desire to create life to flow through their being to create life to create the space which will allow for the refreshing waters of life to flow through the individual. The two rainmakers may even wish to bind Aka Cords to create that joint intention. If the two rainmakers are to be unconditional in their efforts, they each will probably feel the sexuality flowing within their being. However, if the couple can focus their sexuality on each other and away from the individual, three things happen.

The first is the masculine and feminine aspects of the sexuality are neutralized and the individual or individual(s) with whom they are working with will not feel the "thrust" of sexuality toward them which exists when only one rainmaker is present.

The second is that by being in the state of being to create life, the pair of rainmakers will create that space around themselves that allows the individual or individual(s) to experience a fertile space to create life without the sexuality that would otherwise be present. Conception of a new life within the individual(s) as a result of the flow of energy/life give waters experienced can still occur but there will not be the sexual overtones that would otherwise be present.

What essential happens is that the thrusting masculine aspects of the energy are toned down and become more gentle. The feminine nurturing aspects of the energy are strengthen. The result is the individual(s) do not fall into the trap of being frighten by the thrusting masculine nor held and become "addicted" to the softness and gentleness of the feminine to remain bound in the pleasures of the feminine nurturing energy. By neutralizing the sexuality, most of the common traps that people fall into are eliminated or soften such they become bumps in the road rather than pits to fall into.

Many masters and teachers run a very strong feminine energy and individuals become bound and addicted to the softness of this energy rather than continuing on their journey becoming self determined at all levels of their being. Similarly, the harness of the masculine energy is not present so that the discipline and control characteristic of so many traditions is also absent. The additional feature of the male/female pair is that while one is doing, the other can be observing. Hence there can be a very strong balance to capitalize on all the information that is being revealed as the individual(s) respond to the one doing and acting.

The third thing which can occur and which is most important is the male and female can reveal the workings of the individual or individuals inner masculine and inner feminine to see exactly what aspects need to be address. The dance the male and female rainmaker do can become a metatheater to create the tool to reveal what lies within the individual relative to their inner masculine and inner feminine.

Our mind responds to the reality of the world and what is occurring based on what we think and believe. Rather than responding to the truth of what is, we respond through the illusion created by our mind by what we have come to think and believe based on the experiences we have had. So, in essence, we respond to the truth of what is though the illusion of mind. By creating an illusion through metatheater, the mind will respond to the metatheater as reality. In doing so, mind will reveal its inner workings and perception.

Alternatively said, we respond to the truth that is through the illusion of our mind and we response to the illusion of the metatheater through the truth of the mind. As the male and female rainmakers act to shift their shape through metatheater they cause a variety of response to reveal what lies within the mind of the individual which is normally masked. This information then becomes key to creating what needs to be done to bring the inner masculine and inner feminine to maturity to create that wholeness within the individual.

Related topics
Creating a gentle phoenix and the issue of sex
A bottom line about sex and our creativity
Sensual experience beyond sex

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